Transitions.....

Our family is going through another series of transitions, and we would appreciate your prayers as we move from one to the next. I don't know if I'll be blogging (believe me, I'm going to try...this is cheap therapy), so please check back.

We all would appreciate your prayers over the next few days. While every event is a blessing, each comes with its own struggle and adjustment.

Thank you for your readership, and your friendship!

Deena

A Work In Progress...

This is from our study book on page 40, and it brought me great hope and relief:

"Though I'm not yet what I ought to be, thank God, I'm not what I was. And neither are you. For 'He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus,' Philippians 1:6 assures us. Though we may not see the finished product until heaven, you can be sure that what God has started, He will finish. And as long as we daily relinquish control of our lives to Jesus Christ, our transformation will continue."

Isn't that great news!! We're not finished products yet!

Which means that all of the warts and bumps and rough edges and flaws are ok...just as long as there aren't as many today as there were yesterday.

Of course, that also means that there's still transformation yet to be done. And I don't know about you, but sometimes that process HURTS! Sometimes I get comfy-cozy as I am, and don't want to be unraveled and reformed. Sometimes I take the lyrics to the old hymn Just As I Am a little bit too literally...and add a few of my own:

"Just as I am, without one plea, But that Thy blood was shed for me....
O Lamb of God, I come...and I'm done."

Truth is, none of us are complete. None of us are perfect, and none of us are what we should be.

For those who believe they have arrived....I'm sorry, but you done fell out of the boat a ways back!!

When we realize that we are all in the process of sanctification (a big word that means being changed God's way), we can overlook some of the things we do to each other. We can pray for each other.

"Lord, I'm tired of Susie talking to me that way. Could You hurry up and either soften her tongue or toughen my skin?"

We can encourage one another in the changes we see happening in each other's lives. "Janet, I just love the way you pray. It's like you know just what the Father wants you to say."

We can share our burdens, and the areas in which we are desperate for change to come. "You all can pray for me to have more faith and trust in my God...sometimes, it's strong as thick rope...other times, it's as thin as wet spaghetti."

We can be encouraged...because we are in process.

Of course, that means we must walk in the Spirit in order to realize it and live like it. Utmost patience is required for anything occuring in process (i.e., layaway, pregnancy, weight loss, and sanctification). We must bear one another's burdens, we must pray until it hurts (right, Pastor Dave?), and we must never lose heart.

I've heard from many women over the last few weeks about children who are wandering in the desert of the world. It is so hard to wait for a loved one to be made into what God wants...it's even harder to wait for them to get back on the sculpting table.

Keep praying. Surround yourself with warriors of prayer. And keep in mind, He's not done yet. Praise God, He's Not Done!!!!!!!!!

So, be encouraged, dear friends. We're all works in progress....and what beauties we'll be when the Father says, "Done."

Deena

Receiving Answered Prayer

Ok, I'll admit it. Sometimes I pray and then I'm surprised when God answers.

There! Ya happy now??

We've been praying for two years that our oldest daughter would come back to Christ, and as a result, would come back to us.

A miracle is happening, and our prayers are being answered.

And what do we do?

"Are You SURE, God? I mean, we thought this once before, and we got fooled. Are You SURE this is it?"

And then we lurked in the shadows, looking for the hidden things we've missed and watching for the "trap" being laid for us to stumble into.

Shame on me!

Last time, I didn't wait for Him before I plowed ahead.

Last time, I didn't pay attention to the check in my spirit over the whole matter.

Last time, I stopped praying when I thought I had received my answer.

Last time, I took control and tried to force a stubborn, round peg into a rigid, square hole.

But this time I totally surrendered, and felt peace for the first time in 2 years. I felt calmness that transcended what I was dealing with. And I rallied the troops to pray with a force to rattle the heavens.

So, why am I so shocked? Why am I so suspicious? Why am I so uncertain?

Like Rhoda in Acts 12:14, my spirit cries out, "The miracle has happened! The prisoner has been released!"
And my fearful flesh says, "Oh, you're out of your mind!"

How long will my daughter have to stand at the door and knock before I trust God and let her in....

Excuse me, I have to get the door...

Be blessed, keep praying, and believe!!

Deena

Dark Shadows....

This is our last week before we meet for our monthly study, so I'm busy pulling tidbits from chapter three of "Having A Mary Spirit" to share. This was a powerful chapter, and there is so much to discuss!

Such as this statement from page 33: "Because, although we've given Christ complete dominion over our spirits, He must also be welcomed into the other areas of our lives. The dark corners of our hearts still need to be evangelized. Kingdoms in our souls have yet to hear the good news. And that multilevel transformation doesn't happen all at once."

For me, the dark areas deal primarily with hurts that I carry around with me, and ways I've found to cope with the hurt. Being made fun of so much as a child, I tend to shy away from deep committed relationships. Instead, I read a lot. Books are safe, reliable, and don't tell you how (stupid, fat, ugly, unreliable, emotional, etc.) you are.

I was also very spoiled as a child. I was a late in life baby, and basically raised by myself--my brother and two sisters were already out on their own or on their way out. And by the time I came along, Mom and Dad were doing well, so they wanted to "share the wealth" with me...which meant I got anything I wanted and then some.

That doesn't go very well into marriage, let me tell you. And it has taken me years to learn to put my kids first in many areas...which is a WHOLE 'nuther topic to discuss!!!!

What about you? What are some dark areas of your life where the light of God's redeeming love needs to shine?

Food for thought, isn't it??

Praise God He loves us as we are, but too much to leave us the same!!

Be blessed, and then throw open the curtains and let Jesus shine in!

Deena

Question Four, February 25, 2007

"Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in tht it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending His own Son," Romans 8:1-3.

What does it mean to you that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ?

This was a very difficult concept for me to wrap my brain around. I kept reading "condemnation" as "guilt" or "consequences", and getting tangle theology that choked the life out of me spiritually.

What Paul is saying is that we are no longer condemned. There is no longer a death sentence hanging over our heads. We are free for the first time in our lives.

What we do after that is up to us.

The best way I can think to explain what I mean is through an illustration. For the first 21 years of my life I was a Ward. I thought like one, lived like one, identified myself as one, and all of life was wrapped up in being a Ward.

But then, I met my husband. I fell in love. And soon, I went through a ceremony that made me a Peterson. From that point on, my past as a Ward struggled with my present as a Peterson. The old ways of doing things and making decisions clashed with the new ways of functioning as a Peterson.

Since I loved being a Peterson, eventually I grew more like a Peterson and less like a Ward. I will always have some Ward-like tendencies, but I'm more Peterson today than ever before. Not because of my name change, but because of my willingness to become more like a Peterson.

We pass from condemnation, from death, into life instantly at the point of salvation. But do we continue to walk the path of life, or do we go back to our old ways of thinking, doing, and living?

Those ways bring with them the feelings of condemnation, EVEN THOUGH WE ARE NO LONGER UNDER IT. We have to not only believe we are free, but live like it as well.

It does a prisoner no good to know he is free, his death sentence has been overturned, if he continues to sit in his unlocked cell, going through his unnecessary prison routine, and wearing the same prison garments.

No, he must throw off his old identity, taking on his new one and walking, talking and living as a free man, no longer under penalty for his crime.

I had to stop living like I was a Ward and change my ways to being a Peterson for my marriage to work. And it took time. It was a process...it was a forward process. I became a Peterson when I said "I do." We become set free when we say "I believe."

So living under guilt, circumstances of past decisions, and old ways of doing things is to deny the power of being set free. And that is what our flesh person wants us to do. It is a struggle...a day to day mindset we must put on.

The good news is that one day, after constant practice...one day, it will feel as natural as breathing.

So, what does it mean to YOU to be under condemnation no longer?

Be blessed, and be yourself in Christ...set free to serve and to bless others!

Deena

But I Don't Wanna!!

Ever get in the "don't wanna's"? You know, God says, "I want you to do this for Me," and you whine, "But I don't wanna!"

Or God says, "I want you to reach out to this person in My name," and you scuff your foot and duck your head and mutter, "But I don't wanna, God."

That's the frame of mind I'm in. God is tugging on my sleeve in some areas, and I'm hanging back, crying out, "God, I said I don't wanna!"

Some are personal areas...areas I need to grow and change in.

Some are ministry areas, where He wants me to shift gears...areas where I need to stretch and be challenged.

Some are sin areas, where I need to surrender to His cleansing...areas where I've battled habits and patterns that are self-destructive to my spiritual well-being.

The problem is...each of these takes work...yes, the dreaded "W" word...and I'm tired.

I'm tired of trying to figure out decisions that make or break relationships.

I'm tired of trying to be the kind of Christian I'm supposed to be.

I'm tired of trying to have spiritual "buns of steel" with Scripture, prayer and devotion...and ending up with "rolls of fleshy pride" that weigh me down.

I'm tired of trying to help people I love be all they can be for Jesus.

I'm tired of.....of.......

Oh, my.....I'm tired of being god.

Yes, you heard me. Trying to change people, to change myself, to choose which path based on what I see and feel....trying to be god...

And I'm really, REALLY bad at it.

Good thing I'm not god, huh?

So, I guess I have knee time ahead of me. Pray for me. This is hard. I have the best of intentions...but that and a dollar and fifty cents gets you a plain cup of coffee at Starbucks...and that's about all.

Off to seek Godly wisdom...from the One and Only God...**climbing down off the throne...

Be blessed, and say a prayer for me tonight...or whenever you read this blog...I'm sure I'll be needing it...

Deena

Review of Chonda's book...

is blogged on my bookblog

http://deenasbooks.blogspot.com

If you or someone you know is battling depression, please check out this review.

Be blessed,

Deena

R.E.S.T.

I'm tired.

There. I've said it. The world didn't come crashing down, God is still on His throne, and life is still moving on.

I've been tired since my mom's funeral. Seven months ago.

Life feels like a bad carnival ride. And sometimes I feel like I ate too much cotton candy and too many hotdogs...and then got on the ride.

We go and we go and we go. We do and we do and we do.

You know the song, "Life Is A Highway"? I keep watching for the rest stop sign. And I know I'm not alone...I see you there, peering at this blog through weary eyes...

Jesus said to His disciples, "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest," (Mark 6:31).

Jesus is saying to me (and to you), "Come with me, Deena. Come alone, just you and Me...I'll take you someplace where you can rejuvenate yourself in Me."

It only makes sense that we need R.E.S.T.; we must have R.E.S.T.

Soldiers in battle get times of R & R (rest and relaxation) so they don't go crazy in the fighting.

Nascar drivers who don't make pit stops in their races tend to crash and burn more than most.

Doctors on rotation must get rested, or the lives they care for may be harmed more that helped.

So, why don't we take time to R.E.S.T.?

As women, we do for everyone but ourselves. And that is sin. Plain and simple. And I'm right in there with you. I haven't had a vacation since Mom died, nor been left home alone since her funeral. That's seven months of doing, giving, and sharing...and I've done give out and have nothing left...I'm running on fumes.

How about you?

Mothers of small children, women in ministry, and performers are the most prone to burnout, because we're always busy giving, serving, performing.

Where do you fall?

Jesus Himself is crying out for us to find our R.E.S.T. The Sabbath was created for a reason...and I'm not talking theology or a specific day of the week...I'm talking principle here.

I'm reading a book by Chonda Pierce called "Laughing In the Dark" that chronicles her battle with clinical depression (my review will be posted sometime later today). She was advised to take three hours a day and do nothing...absolutely nothing.

I'm not advising that. But I am telling you that if you don't allow for some down time in your life, you are never going to be fully effective for the Kingdom, for your family, and for those around you.

Many, many books are being published dealing with this very topic. A few good ones are "The Rest of God" by Mark Buchanon, "Living Simply" by Joanne Heim, and anything written by Keri Wyatt Kent.

We must take time out for us. Not to sin, not to be selfish...but to R.E.S.T. We need Relief, Energizing, Simplicity and Trust. Did you catch that? That is what rest is. Relief from our daily burdens, a chance to energize our spirits and our bodies, getting back to the simple things of life, and trusting God that, if we take some time off, He won't be disappointed in us and all will be well with our souls.

So, plan a mini-vacation. And then take it. No more excuses. Get some R.E.S.T. Remember, Jesus calls you...He calls me...to come away with Him and Him alone...

Be blessed, and get some R.E.S.T.....then be a blessing to someone else...

Deena

P.S. Go and read the 23rd Psalm...it says "He makes me to lie down in green pastures..." So, force is required to get us to rest. Is He going to have to make you, too?

A Letter To My Daughter...

My Dearest child,

How I miss you! It seems you've been gone for so long. I miss our long talks, how you would share everything in your life with me. But you grew so secretive, and even though I knew what was happening, I chose to let you go your own way for a time.

But how my heart yearns to connect with yours again! How I miss spending time with you, and hearing all about your needs, your wants, your plans...how I miss sharing your life with you.

My arms long to hold you close to me. I want so much just to take care of you, to watch out for you, to guide you and to continue to teach you all that I know.

I know this world has been cruel to you. I remember what it was like for me. I know that life can be unfair, and sometimes it seems as if people won't stop until they have destroyed you. It may seem at times as if the world has won and you are done, but you're not. Not as long as you have me.

And you will always have me. I will always be there for you. My love for you will never change; it doesn't get stronger based on what you do, and it doesn't weaken based on what you don't do. My love for you hasn't changed since the day I gave you life, and it never will.

I would give my life for you.

In fact, I did.

Won't you give yours to me?

Come home, my daughter. My arms are open wide.

Love,

God

Transformers...

One of the biggest struggles I see in the lives of the people I love who believe in Jesus is this...allowing Him to transform them. This is covered again and again in our book, "Having A Mary Spirit."

We are flesh, and we are spirit, and the two war against one another. In order to walk according to the spirit, we have to feed that part of us. Through preaching, teaching, study of God's Word, and prayer, our spirit becomes stronger and able to crucify the flesh when it rises up.

We call this "transformation".

But transformation takes time, takes work, takes effort...most of all, it takes surrender to His divine Will and purpose for us. We won't always have the answers we want or think we need...we won't always know how it's going to go or when it's going to be over...we won't always know the outcome or end result...except that we'll look more like Him and less like us.

Sometimes I think we are willing to let Jesus be Savior, but not Lord. "You can keep me out of hell, Jesus, and forgive me when I sin...but do NOT tell me what to do!"

He cannot be our Savior if He is not our Lord...He doesn't just want to forgive us, He wants to transform us...He has to be able to tell us what to do, because we don't know what to do on our own.

It doesn't matter if we're 10, 20, 30, or 70...we will always need Jesus to guide us, instruct us, correct us....to transform us.

Remember that old commercial for the Transformer toys..."Transformers--more than meets the eye..." That should be us. There should be more to us than just what is seen on the outside...we have the Spirit of God dwelling inside us. Let Jesus transform you today into more than meets the eye...

You won't regret it. But you will have to let Him tell you what to do.

Be blessed, and then let Him use you to bless someone else.

Deena

P.S. Still battling the headache, and have a major life decision to make with my family...please continue to keep us in prayer. Thank you!!

Prayer Request...

Hi...I don't know if I'll be blogging today...

I'm battling a headache that borders on migraine...have had it for two days...

It hurts just to think, which means I'm miserable, 'cause I'm ALWAYS thinking about something...

If you would, please pray for me...

Deena

Minds Gone Wild!!

Today I watched "Wednesdays With Beth" on Life Today (James & Betty Robison). She's teaching a series on trusting God, and it is MARVELOUS...I would love to be able to teach and inspire like Beth Moore...and yes, I remember my post on wishing I was someone else vs. liking who I am......this is a godly envy:-)

She spoke today about how we tend to trust God in all areas of our lives...but not in that one thing. The one thing we tell God and anyone who will listen "If that ever happens, I won't be able to survive...I just won't make it."

She spoke of something I've heard of before, but never really thought much about until today. Maybe you've heard of it as well. It comes from Romans 1:21: "Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened."

Now, what I understand this to mean is simply a mind gone wild. You know, borrowing trouble, imagining the worst case scenario, worrying yourself sick over something...

Did I nail anybody with that besides me??? I'm famous for borrowing trouble...and I always pay it back...

But Jesus (and Jack Bauer) said, "Don't worry about tomorrow, today has enough trouble for it's own."

We do well just to get through one 24 hour period before we tackle another one. Which is not to say we shouldn't plan for the future...but that is nothing like what we are discussing here.

I tend to worry, "What if our daughter never comes back to Jesus?" and then project into the future the possible scenarios...telling God I trust Him in every area but this one.

I used to worry about what I would do when Dad/Mom/someone I loved died...and would stress and fret and think I would just melt in despair. And yet, here I am, with both Mom and Dad in heaven with Jesus...I'm not happy about them being gone, but my life is moving forward and I survived.

How much time did I waste worrying about them when I could have been spending time with them? How much time do I spend preaching at my daughter when I should simply be loving her?

Which I would have done, would do, if I trusted God in those areas of my life.

We love and trust Him in so many ways, but there is that one thing...we hold onto it for dear life, protecting it and shielding it...and telling God how we want Him to take care of it.

And when He doesn't do as we want Him to, we say, "See, I knew I couldn't trust You with it..." and justify our sin...totally missing the point.

So, I'm vowing to stop my vain imaginations...my wild imagination...my mind gone wild...and to trust Him. When I feel myself going into that state of panic, my stomach in knots and my head in turmoil...I will stand against the enemy and say, "No, devil. No more. I'm done with this..." and hand it over to my Father.

Lord willing and I draw strength from Him...this is what I vow to do. Please pray for me that I will be able to do this, and I will pray for you as well.

Please let me know what you think...

Be blessed, and reign in that mind..."We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ," II Corinthians 10:5

Deena

Owner, or Ownership?

I've been pondering this for a few days now, and since I think better out loud than inside my head, you get to ponder it along with me.

My husband introduced me to a dynamic pastor by the name of Mark Driscoll. He's not every one's cup of tea, but he is definitely mine, and I've been listening to his sermon series "Christians Gone Wild" on my iPod...lovin' the iPod!!

He has this wacky and wild idea that the church belongs to Jesus...that Jesus owns the church. He is merely a servant of Christ, pastoring Christ's church, and that he answers to Him. That everything about the local church should and must center around Jesus and Him alone.

So, then I began thinking...we don't own the church...that's a given. But we must assume ownership of it, or we won't care enough to participate in what happens to her.

Maybe this will help...maybe I'm a nut...I don't know...You decide.

My husband and I bought a brand new car, for the first time, last June. We don't own it...the credit company does. But we do maintain ownership of it. We are responsible for the upkeep, maintenance, payments, and general care of the car. Even though the bank owns it.

So, even when we say "The church belongs to Jesus," we still maintain ownership...we're the caretakers, if you will. We are responsible for the care and maintenance of her. So if we don't tithe, we are neglecting her. If we don't serve, we aren't caring for her. And if we aren't in some way invested in our local church body, then we won't feel we have a stake in how well she does.

Too many believers come and sit and soak and then go home. That's not what we're meant to do. We have work to do, work we are each called to do.

But, on the other hand, too many believers claim they own the church by their behavior...things must go their way, or they are done and gone...they take the ownership too far and become the rightful owner.

Jesus owns the church. She is bought and paid for with His own blood. But we are to care for her, invest in her, and serve her. As long as we keep it in perspective, we'll all do just fine. Oh, there might be some bumps and bruises along the way...but overall, the work will get done and the Lord will be served...and one day, one glorious day, He'll come and take His church home.

Til then, we've got work to do...for the Master.

Be blessed, and ask God today how you can serve Him through His church...make an investment that will last an eternity.

Deena

Counting my Blessings or my Burdens?

You ever get into a funk? You know, one of those indescribable moods, where you just have this blech feeling, but can't put your finger on why?

We get those a lot in our house. I suspect it's because my husband is in ministry, and they are just general attacks from the enemy...we've been in ministry so long that he's better off sneaking up on us through the blahs than through a full on attack.

Anyhoo, I'm feeling a funk coming on...so I thought I'd blog:-) Nothing like sharing my feelings on the world wide web to snap a girl out of a funk, eh??

I've been thinking a lot lately (nothing new there!!)...why do I tend to count my burdens instead of my blessings? I have a wonderful life...true, it's filled with trials and struggles...but who's isn't?

The cool thing about God is He doesn't candy coat the Christian life..read James, I Peter, the Gospel accounts...it isn't "IF" troubles and trials come our way, but "WHEN"...

So, why can't I be like Paul advises me to be...thinking on the positive side of life? I'm not talking about painting everything with the rose-colored brush...life hurts and it makes us bleed, and there's no good reason to hide it from anyone.

I'm talking about focusing on the blessings instead of the burdens...for instance:

1) My oldest is away from God right now...but she's healthy (for the most part), and she is still in contact with me, which allows me to talk about God with her when maybe no one else will.

2) We homeschool, which adds to my stress level, but it is so wonderful to have my child get an "A" on an essay, and know I had a hand in helping her get the grade, and that the content in the essay is based on what she's experienced through her family.

3) My husband is a pastor who works fulltime (no such thing as a parttime pastor!), which limits his time and sometimes brings great stress into our lives. But he is an amazing man who continually blows me away with his insight into Scripture and finds gems like Mark Driscoll to share with me, which rejuvenates us both for the work God has called us to do.

4) My mom passed away in August, and she was my best friend in the entire world...but my sister and I are closer now than ever...in fact, she plans to attend our Wholly Devoted women's fellowship with me in March...if she doesn't chicken out on meeting new people...!

And the list is endless...

My life isn't easy. Compared to some, it looks like a cakewalk...compared to others, it's the crummy part of the cakewalk...but it's life.

I read this on someone else's blog, so it's not an original thought, but I did tweak it a bit...

Life is not to make me happy...it's to make me holy...so even though life gets hard, if it draws me into the arms of my Father, so be it. If it teaches me to depend on the One who is most dependable, so be it. If it prepares my heart for heaven, so be it...I know it makes me long for heaven all the more...

So, my dear friend, not to make light of your troubles and trials, but please, consider counting your blessings instead of your burdens. From someone who's been there and done that, it will lighten your load and encourage your heart...and honor and glorify your Father, who desperately loves you.

Deena

My Heart Is Hurting....

but I'm fine. My prayer to get out the pit of despair has been answered, but honestly, it's a struggle to not slide back into it...the sides are slick and I'm constantly tempted to dance on the edge...Lord, hold me back and fence me in, Please!

Pray for my daughter. She is in danger of losing her job, and this is one I truly want her to keep. The environment is healthy, the people are encouraging and uplifting, and she will learn what it means to serve others.

Not only that, but it will allow her to remain independent, at least, as independent as a squirrelly 20 year old can be.

Your prayers are being heard...so many of my requests to you God is answering...He is moving in this situation...and while my heart hurts, I'm no longer discouraged nor despairing.

Which brings me to this...why do we struggle so to have faith in our God? In our Heavenly Father, who is all powerful and all knowing and all loving...the One who knows what is best for us in each and every situation??

What is so broken in His creation that we will cry out to anything BUT Him? Now, THAT breaks my heart...

I long to give good things to my daughter...I long to bring her home until my arms ache to hold and comfort her...I long to take care of her...

How much more does our Father long to bless us, to give good things to us, to hold and comfort us, to care for us...and we turn and say, "No. I can do it myself. Thank you, though."

How sad...how incredibly, tragically sad.

As a mother of a wayward, struggling child...hear my heart today...let God love on you. Let Him bless you. Let Him take care of you.

In order to do that, you must be obedient. You must read and take in His words. You must follow His leading. You must love and acknowledge Him in your life. You must. It's that simple.

And it's that critical. The Father's heart bleeds for His children...He loves us...He adores us...He died for us...

The least we can do is obey and follow.

Your turn...

Be blessed, and all praise to Our Father in Heaven who loves and lavishes His best on His children!!

Deena

Question of the Week, February 18, 2007

What does Romans 13:14 say about handling our lower nature...

"Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature."

Wow. I had to pick this one, didn't I?

Well, first of all, if I'm clothed in Him, I won't feel the need to cover myself with my own works and good stuff that I do. I suppose this is what Scripture means when it talks about being clothed in His righteousness.

The second part of the verse....well, that just nails my hide to the wall. I'm always plotting and planning on how to accomplish this or how to obtain that thing, that book, that dinner out with my husband.

I exhaust myself conniving and creating scenarios and arguments and debates inside my head, always, always, always for my own satisfaction and purposes.

My favorite is when someone upsets me or makes me mad, and I spend DAYS getting my pound of flesh, thinking of clever comebacks and snide remarks and dazzling debates to get my point across and feel satisfied with the outcome.

That makes me so incredibly tired...and what does it profit me?

A big, fat NOTHING.

If only I thought as much about furthering the kingdom, encouraging a brother or sister in Christ, serving my church family, and doing my best to out give a more than generous Heavenly Father.

Time to go change clothes...my filthy rags for His robe of righteousness...

Your turn!

Be blessed my dear family!!

Deena

A Rallying Cry...

For those who read my blogs, please hear my heart.

I desperately ask for your prayers.

My oldest daughter, Victoria, has been on a journey away from God for several years. She has estranged herself from her family (in a very bizarre fashion), and has been battered about by the world in ways I will not describe, but that would have brought most to their knees by now.

However, in my spirit, I sense shift in the tides of her life.

The past two days, I have had an opportunity to speak with her about her spiritual walk in ways I have never had. God has given me a boldness that blows me away...it's one of those times where I sit back and wonder "Where did THAT come from?!"

She seems receptive...but appearances can deceive. But we have talked candidly and I have held nothing back...calling sin sin and reminding her of her calling in God.

She has met another young man, and I have to admit...I feel something in my spirit over this one. His name is Brandy, and he is in the military. While I should be feeling "Oh, here we go again..." this time I feel...

HOPE.

So, join with me. Pray for these two young people. She tells me he is a believer who has walked away, just as she has. There are issues involved that I know God does not honor, but despite that, I still feel a stirring regarding her that I haven't felt in...I don't know how long.

And I feel a peace. For the first time in ages, I feel a true peace in my soul regarding my daughter. Maybe because I've allowed God to pull me from the muck and the mire of the pit she threw me in all those years ago with her rebellion.

Regardless, I like this peaceful feeling. I want to claim it and keep it. But I am a flawed and fragile being...would you also pray for me to keep my peace and mind centered on Him?

This is a dangerous path I walk with her. It is filled with pits and temptations and distractions...but if I can keep my eyes from turning to the left or to the right, and keep them on my precious Savior's back as He goes before us, it will be all right.

Please, pray for restoration for Victoria and Brandy to God. Pray for me to remain in Him regardless of what comes. And pray for the powerful potential in Jesus that I sense in these two precious young people.

Be blessed, and thank you from the depths of my soul for your prayers,

Deena

Profiling...

Ok, we're going to get a little personal today...hope you're ready for it!!

In our book, "Having A Mary Spirit", on pages 28-29, Joanna gives us a profile for our flesh woman...or as I like to call mine, "Evil Gertrude"....

Which of these telltale signs identify your Flesh Woman?

1) A prideful spirit
2) A love of praise
3) A touchy temper
4) A willful attitude
5) A fearful heart
6) A jealous mind
7) A dishonest disposition
8) A lack of faith
9) A wandering eye
10) A spiritual deadness
11) A love of self

Before you do this self exam, I recommend praying Psalm 139:23-24 as Joanna lists at the end of this segment.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart...know it inside and out...see if there is any wicked way in me...I know there is, but I want You to uncover it...and lead me in the way everlasting...show me the path out of the pit of Evil Gertrude...I want her to leave me alone to be who You want me to be..."

Ok, having done that, this is what I came up with for me...I know beyond any doubt that I am guilty of every sign of that flesh woman...but two plague me frequently, nay, every day...

I have such a fearful heart...I hate not knowing what will happen in a certain situation...I'm dealing with two of them right now. I struggle with letting God have His way, and I get upset with Him because He won't "clue me in"...if He'd just tell me more, I wouldn't be so afraid...

But it doesn't work that way. And most likely, if He did tell me, it would scare me to death, paralyzing me and making me even more ineffective than my fear already tends to make me.

My other biggest battle with Evil Gertrude is a lack of faith...they tend to go hand in hand. I'm fearful because I lack faith...

What it all boils down to is I have a difficult time trusting God. Oh, not all the time, just in crunch times...the times I need to trust Him the most, of course.

Joanna describes a lack of faith like this:

"Are you easily discouraged in times of pressure and opposition? Do you lack quiet confidence and settled trust in God? Do you worry and complain in the midst of pain, poverty or trials that God allows? Are you overly anxious about whether situations will turn out all right?"

That is me to a T...unfortunately. And I hate that. Oh, how I long to be a pillar of strength, able to withstand every storm of life with a serene smile and a calm spirit...Instead, I tend to become a whimpering mass of jello, quivering in my shoes and constantly asking God, "Are you SURE it's going to be ok?"

But did you catch that one phrase that caught my eye: ..."That God allows."...now, THAT packed a punch...He allows these things into my life, into our lives, so that we WILL learn to trust Him....so that we WON'T lack faith when they come.

I'm pleased to realize that I don't stay lacking in faith as long as I used to...I am able to trust Him in the midst...but not after some healthy whine (no cheese, though). So, pray for me in these two areas, if you would please...I and Evil Gertrude would appreciate it very, very much...

Your turn....

Be blessed today, my dear friend...God loves you, and He thinks you're pretty neat!!

Deena

For Those Who Pray...

Ok, I've started this honestly policy in my life (oh, Father, what have I done?)...so...

I want to thank those of you who pray for me. You kept me safe. I was in a minor fender bender today.

I would LOVE to tell you I did God proud, but I was a little testy when she started in on me...only a little, mind you.

My kids think I'm a hero, but I know...I'm just a mom with feet of clay...and probably higher insurance...

Please pray...don't know how this will ultimately play out...but I and my trusty Kia are well.

Be blessed, and pray for someone today...you never know what they may need...

Deena

A Safe Place...

(Yay, a bonus blog!! I just have a lot on my mind today, I guess... )

See if you can guess my riddle:

When you install a new stove/oven, what do you have to have?

When you light a fire in the fireplace, what is the one thing you must be sure you have for the fire to burn adequately?

Where does dryer exhaust need to go?

My mom once had a pressure cooker. She used to make this delicious Burgundy Beef (one of the few times alcohol was allowed in my restrictive Baptist home...I was VERY impressed as a child! LOL!).

I was fascinated and fearful at the same time.

The cooker had this little wobbly thing on the top that let steam escape. Without it, my mom said it would explode, becoming a danger, even a deadly weapon. I would watch it from a distance, praying God wouldn't let the wobbly thing fall off or get clogged up.

So, the answer to my riddle?

They all need a place to VENT.

Now, if inanimate objects need safe places to vent, HELLO!!! So do we.

I discussed this a little bit last night with a dear friend. We all struggle with the need to vent, to share our burdens, as opposed to not wanting to gossip, as opposed to not wanting to give people a reason to back stab us, as opposed to not wanting people to judge us, etc.

I believe that if we don't find a safe place to let off steam, we will be like my mom's pressure cooker-- we'll explode, becoming a danger to others.

Of course, the safest place to do this is with God. We have got to be honest in our prayers. If we truly believe He is the God we say He is, He can handle anything we throw at Him. And He already knows it anyway. So if your prayer life isn't honest, well, that's a problem that needs correcting quickly.

Beth Moore, my hero, says this: "If we tattle to Daddy-God, we won't be as likely to tattle to sister so and so." And she's totally right.

Sometimes, though, I need that reassuring hug, that look of understanding, that shoulder to cry on. I'm sure you do as well.

So, what does a Godly Christian woman do?

A few suggestions, in my humble opinion:

1) First and foremost, are you talking to God about it all? It does no good to talk to someone about your struggles and burdens if you're not talking to Him.

Once you've found someone to confide in, or vent with:

2) What does she say about other people? Chances are, if she talks about others and their struggles, she'll talk about yours as well.

3) Has she walked the same path you are walking? Then you may find a compassionate ear here...just take what she shares to the Scriptures.

4) Test the waters. Don't dive in head first before you know what's under the surface. Share a little before you share a lot.

5) Don't unburden with just one person all the time. You might be tempted to see them as your rescuer, and ignore your True Deliverer...

6) What's the purpose in your venting? Is it to harm or to heal? If you just want to "spill your guts", you might want to rethink it and take it to God only. But if you need help sorting the truth from the fiction, or the problem from the solution...two heads can be better than one.

7) Make sure you're still connected to the Vine, and then trust your heart. If you feel uncomfortable sharing, ask yourself why. Sometimes it isn't appropriate, and sometimes we don't want to be "exposed"...check your spirit, and proceed from there.

Most of all, we have to, as a body of believers, as the church of the Living God, get to the point where we can listen, bear one another's burdens, and pray for those overtaken in sin...because that's what we're TOLD to do in Scripture...and to [those] who know to do right and do it not, it is sin....."

Be blessed and trust in Him, and ask who He wants you to bless today...

Deena